Is this how it works…??

It started with hatred from my side.
I had my friends and he was their classmate, used to come and sit with us, ate with us and gradually he hanged out with us too.
His habbits were annoying to me, speaking different tone of Gujarati which was unbearable for me, used to abuse a little too, but his face always said something which i wasnt able to read.
Slowly, i learnt he lives in the same area as i do.
Slowly again, i came to know him, know him deep and down, inside out, he was heaven, he was always an open book, maybe i made a mistake judging him too soon just based on his accent.
He was frank because he didnt care about “what people will say”, he never took shit from anybody so he abused, he was fair, tit for tat kinda guy, i never really saw him the way he was, i always saw him the way i wanted to see him and the way my inner concious allowed me to.
Now i was a fool who failed to read an open book.
My soul was attracted to his each n every move. I wanted to talk to him, to be with him.
Now that happened, though not like how i imagined but i talked to him all day, i was not embarrassed for sending my ugly and beautiful snaps, i was so familiar with him, he was a friend that i would never wanna leave.
Now that i knew him, i came to know he was always this innocent and cute, that i never noticed… I blamed myslef hard for not seeing that before…
Spent time with him, came home with him, talked to him all day.
I knew what had started inside me, yes i liked him to a great extent, a great deal… He had to now know my feelings too, but as usual, the fear of friendship break crap held me back.

Still gathered some courage and confessed anonymously, i mean soo stupid that idea was, i still laugh hard at my sillyness.
As smart he was, it didn’t took him more than 5 minutes to know that it was me. I knew it was silly and now he knew how i felt. I was so fucking scared, turns out, the threat of friendship being broken is real, soo real it hurts like bad, took the hell out of me that moment.
Ofcourse he now took less time to talk to me day by day. He stopped eventually.
No doubt that he was dear to drop me home after all this with a smiling face.
After a long time,i thought i was over him, but no, when i saw him again in the same circle, same ground with same friends, my heart started doing its beating fast thing really fast. I tried to avoid eye contact to show him i didn’t care, less did i knw that actuly indicates am desperate enough…..
I still asked if someone was alone on a vehicle and could care to drop me, in general. Nobody said anything.
Getting out of the college gate, he asked with an authority, if I wanted to go with him or not, me being the desperate bitch went with him without any further arguement…….
I kinda had sweet type of anxiety that time sitting behind him, which later proved correct. I was feeling a little smug but confused, i had the habbit of asuming incorrect options so to clear my doubt, i asked what he meant by going out for food right now???
He chuckled and said “i hoped for this date since a long time, i wanted to talk to you, i wanted to say that i like you too”.
Thats it, if i were on ground and not on his bike on the middle of a highway, i would have started jumping and dancing and hugged him really hard and probably kissed him too…….
I guess i liked him with all that shiddatt (devotion) that he understood my feeling, accepted them, and confessed his side too… At that moment i actully really wanted to hug him from back but there was still the new awkwardness…
Wanted to see how it end but unfortunately i woke up by surrounding sounds and woke up to level 0.

Broken

This heart is imperfect, broken, deshaped , and has many parts but atleast it can be refixed  by joining in each other or with some other!!

UNLIKE  the real heart, which is broken but cannot b fixed easily with itself or with any other!!! 

Her…..

She cant even get her own space,

She cant even get out of house,

She cant get mad,

She cant get frustrated,

Just because she is a GIRL.

She has to be a slave forever,

When she is with her parents, slave of her own parents,

When she gets married, slave of her better half,

Nothing she could do about  this,

Never would she be able to change herself or the others…..

She was a slave, she is a slave , she will be a slave…….

A Dream

He was with her,

Sitting just beside her,

Talking to her,

Suddenly something happened to her,

She fainted,

And all the classmates surrounded her,

He shouted like hell, help help water someone please bring water,

She opened her eyes when droplets of water touched her eyes,

He hugged her and confessed “i love you, i love you soo much, i cant afford to loose you one more time”,

She thought it was a dream,

Him saying i love you to her that she was dying to hear from him since years,

And she knew it could not be real,
She was not from a beautiful kinds,
And she knew that and accepted that,

But was it a dream then?

Whatever it was, she wanted to enjoy it because it seemed real,

He was with her,

And she needed nothing more than this,

She never prayed for anything but HIM,

And now he was with her,

He asked to take a picture of both for a memory forever,

She took out her phone and still she was in a dilema what to do,

SHE told him to pinch her, as she wanted to believe that all this was true,

And her eyes opened wide at the dawn,

She smiled and blushed and closed her eyes……. to fall in sleep again, to dream of him again…….

Eternal Love

We can surely be friends,

I will be your  friend , you be my love,

You can make as many girlfriends  you want , 

I will be more and more happy everytime that you find someone  compatible,

And when you dont find her compatible enough,

I will be by your side as a good friend, you just need to call my name,  

You can share your anything with me, I promise i will understand and help get it through,

And remember I will always love you even if you don’t love me back, 

I dont need your love to love you,

I just love you, and that’s what matters to me,

Because my love is eternal, enough for both of us……..

EXAMS!!!!

WHEN  you have 2 exams on one day, 

Both subjects important,

But you know nothing in a single subject,

You didnt sleep whole night for them, but still you are blank , 

THEN  you just stop studying and  leave it on your fate!!!😂😂😂

But she did…..

She could have died that day without any regrets!

She was happier than ever, now she also had her special moments which she always wished for!

That sudden hand to hand touch on table, those playing with eyes moments, those stares for 2 minutes and sudden breakdown, back hugs on vehicle😙😙

She had her other dreams but that day was the day when even if something happened to her, or may be she met an accident she would not have regrets at her last moments but only his name on her lips. Thats all she wanted.

But he was not his boyfriend, and somethings that didn’t count in her ethics, she had to refuse before anything came more than just all this……

How could she refuse??

It was the only thing she wanted for since last few years, it was the only wish she wished for, it was really special for her, how could she deny the truth which she craved for soo long??

She was with him, her only dream, her only reality, her heart and her soul!

To be with the only person she loved over years made her happy, she finally got time to spend with him!

She was happy, she was having her best time, she felt his touch, she was happier than ever before, she wanted time to stop just there and never start again, he was her life , then why would she refuse??

All the feelings were overwhelming, she was happy but nervous, excited but worried, she was a real mess from inside, although she showed only her happiness from outside, but how was she going to refuse??? 

Best friendship…..

Best friend do not need to talk everyday to prove their best friendship, they are the same haramis even after 1 day , 1 weak or 1 year.

They don’t need to meet everyday, even if they meet after days , their first line would be like “wassup harami??”